Tuesday, February 23, 2010

The Yin and Yang of it all...

Trying to find balance--really, I am. Still so sad about Punch. I miss him dearly. It's been a day-by-day, tearful struggle, starting when I step out of the bedroom in the morning. I still expect him to be there, patiently waiting on the rug for our time together, before anybody else is awake. That's when I would pet him and repeatedly tell him he is a wonderful boy: "Punchy's adorable! Yes you are!" Upon hearing "adorable," he'd often look at me (while laying on his back), and curl his front paws around his tilted head. Just one of his funny little tricks he'd do. Definitely adorable.

But he's not there.

Strange how we have such habits. Intellectually knowing something no longer exists, but habitually behaving as if it does. Makes me wonder how many of my thoughts and actions are simply on automatic. Stimulus--> response. Same stimulus --> same response. It's probably my mind's way of trying to cope with it all; a denial of sorts. Unfortunately, having to remind myself again and again makes me feel the pain again and again. Perhaps, with each little reminder, the sharpest pain subsides a little, replaced with a sort of dull acceptance? If so, it's gonna take awhile. I'm still reaching for the phone to give my Mom a quick call and tell her the latest news.....

And there is some. I have the pictures to prove it. I'll show you in a day or two. Really, I will!

* * * * * * * * *

In the meantime, I'm hardly the first person in my family to mourn a beloved pet: I come from generations of animal lovers. I take solace in that.

This is my paternal Grandma, Mattie. Both pictures were taken in the 1920's, down on the farm.
The one on the left is with Bob and Max.
The right one is Grandma doing her best Holly Hobby impression with Max.

In the 1930's, Mattie & Hans had Duke.
Duke was a Southerner....Hans & Mattie left the Midwest to live in Miami for a few years.
Their return trip in a Model-T included two Siamese cats and Duke in the back seat!

This is my Great-Grandma, Mattie's mother, standing with King and Duke.
(To put things into perspective: as far as I know,
she was not a short woman!)

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Joie de vivre!

* * * * * * * * *
Life does not cease to be funny when people die
any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh.
--George Bernard Shaw

Yes...the yin & yang of it all!...

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